Summary of "Why You’re Done With Ministry"

Summary of Key Wellness Strategies, Self-Care Techniques, and Productivity Tips from Why You’re Done With Ministry

The discussion centers on the emotional and practical challenges of deciding whether to leave a church staff position or ministry role. The presenters explore the complexity of feelings involved, the role of spiritual discernment, and practical steps for navigating ministry transitions with integrity and self-awareness.

Key Wellness and Self-Care Strategies

Distinguish Feelings from Spiritual Leading Be cautious about interpreting feelings of frustration or unhappiness as a direct call from the Holy Spirit to leave. Reflect on whether emotions are driving the decision or if it is a clear spiritual conviction.
Check the Condition of Your Heart Assess if your heart is hardened by negativity or bitterness, which can cloud spiritual discernment. Practice self-honesty about personal responsibility in the situation rather than blaming external factors.
Avoid Overspiritualizing Difficult Circumstances Recognize that hardship or conflict does not necessarily mean God is telling you to leave. Scripture encourages perseverance and joy through trials (James 1:2-4), not immediate exit.
Focus on Walking in the Ways of Jesus Prioritize aligning your actions with Jesus’ teachings and Scripture rather than solely focusing on “what God’s will” is in terms of leaving. Deepen your engagement with the Word and community before making major decisions.
Manage Negativity and “If I” Statements Avoid framing your experience around conditional “if only” thoughts that fuel dissatisfaction. Work on shifting attitude and mindset to reduce negativity that can lead to burnout or premature departure.
Leave Well and Leave Better If leaving is the decision, aim to exit with grace, preserving relationships and the health of the church community. Avoid damaging the church environment or sowing discord on the way out.
Know When It’s a “Me” Issue Sometimes the problem is personal—your expectations, personality, or approach may not fit the church environment. Consider if you need internal growth or healing before moving on.
Recognize Fit and Personality Differences Some personalities (highly entrepreneurial, driven, idea-oriented) may struggle in traditional church staff roles that require conformity to leadership vision. It’s okay to acknowledge if vocational ministry or a specific church environment is not a good fit.
Consider the Impact on Family and Church Attendance Avoid making employment status the sole reason to change your family’s church home. Seek to maintain connection to a faith community even if you leave a staff role.
Practical Steps for Decision-Making Before leaving, evaluate:
- Are you still able to attend the church without conflict?
- Can you leave the position better than you found it?
- Are you leaving because of a spiritual conviction or emotional reaction? Engage in honest conversations with leadership and family about the decision.
Avoid Career Hopping in Ministry Jumping from church to church without addressing underlying issues often leads to repeated dissatisfaction. Take time to process and grow before entering a new ministry role.

Productivity Tips

Use coaching or counseling as a tool to explore your feelings and situation holistically before making decisions.
Engage with mentors, spiritual advisors, or trusted peers to gain perspective and avoid isolation in decision-making.
Reflect on your calling and gifting realistically to find environments where you can thrive.