Subs wanting to be owned by a Femdom

Overview

The speaker (a femdom/mistress who refers to herself as the Red Queen / Mistress Nera) speaks candidly and informally about BDSM dynamics (especially “being owned”), relationships with subs, pet care, beauty/makeup, safety, authenticity online, and gear quality. Much of the talk is anecdotal and blunt.

BDSM / Sub Ownership — Expectations and Advice

• Being “owned” is a relationship and a responsibility, not a transactional one. Large tributes do not automatically prove loyalty, obedience, or long-term consistency.
• Ownership and submission should be negotiated and tailored to the individuals involved — there is no one-size-fits-all agreement.
• Ways a sub can demonstrate commitment:
  • Show consistency over time rather than one-off tributes.
  • Complete assigned real-world tasks (e.g., chores) and document them (photos/videos) when requested.
  • Be honest about desires, limits, and capabilities; do not misrepresent yourself.
  • Follow screening/application steps for in-person sessions (safety procedures like cash-meet protocols, information sharing).
• Warning: many people expect quick results or treat ownership like a quick kink fix. True ownership requires investment and time.
• The speaker refuses requests to badmouth someone’s partner as part of play.

Safety & Screening

• Exercise caution with cash meets and in-person sessions.
• Expect responsible doms/owners to request information and follow screening steps to ensure safety for everyone involved.
• If you are new to BDSM, start slowly. Reputable dominants typically will not “own” someone for minimal tributes.

Pets & Pet-Related Tributes

• The speaker has multiple dogs and expects subs to help fund pet care (food, toys, beds, vet visits, medication).
• Typical estimates mentioned:
  • Vet bills: roughly $250 (conservative example).
  • Ongoing monthly pet support is expected from a pet-funded sub.
• Tips:
  • Address health issues early (example: a three-legged dog showing signs of arthritis).
  • The speaker would prefer a dedicated “pet sub” to cover ongoing pet expenses.

Beauty / Makeup / Beauty-Subs

• The speaker sometimes streams beauty purchases and accepts a “beauty regime sub” to pay for beauty boxes, makeup, and related items.
• Conservative monthly tribute estimate: $150–$200.
• Product mentions:
  • Becca foundation (new)
  • Kat Von D foundation (previously used)
  • Boxycharm (beauty box picks)
• Practical beauty tips:
  • Wear sunscreen, especially avoid tanning your face to reduce premature wrinkles.
  • Be cautious with filters and Facetune; edited images can create unattainable standards and encourage unnecessary cosmetic procedures.
  • Know your real look and avoid over-tweaking your photos.
• Seasonal makeup note: she mixes foundations seasonally to avoid an orange look.

Gear Quality (BDSM Toys and Whips)

• Invest in quality gear rather than cheap knockoffs (better floggers, riding crops, whips matter for real play and impact).
• Recommended sources: Etsy and specialty BDSM suppliers for durable, artisan gear.
• The speaker has received play gear from subs (flogger, riding crop) and would like future subs to help buy equipment (e.g., bullwhip, high-end riding crop — mentions Hermes as a luxury example).
• Practical note: purchases from her wishlist may be rewarded with content/photography in appreciation.

Authenticity Online & Filters

• Many influencers use Facetune/Snow filters; this skews beauty expectations and self-perception.
• Some people avoid filters to stay authentic; advice is to be mindful about image editing and how it affects self-esteem.
• Recommendation: do not set impossible beauty standards for yourself based on heavily edited images.

Relationships & Personal Boundaries

• If you’re in a toxic relationship, the speaker advises getting out — she acknowledges this is difficult and shares personal experience leaving a difficult partner.
• Subs should treat dominants (women they serve) with respect; being a sub includes appreciating those you serve.
• The speaker rejects attempts to emulate “female supremacy” by trashing other women or engaging in home-wrecking/shaming behavior.

Other Practical Ideas

• Some subs manage practical tributes like opening/storing cards (e.g., a gas card) or paying bills/credit cards for the dom when boundaries and limits are agreed upon.
• Wish-list model: using Amazon/Etsy wishlists or gift cards as tribute is common and appreciated, but not a substitute for genuine commitment.

Notable Locations, Products, and Mentions

• Locations: Atlanta (traffic anecdote), California (gas price mention).
• Products/services: Boxycharm, Becca foundation, Kat Von D foundation, Etsy (artisan whip makers), Amazon (wishlists), Hermes riding crop (desired luxury item), HomeGoods / T.J. Maxx.
• Channels/people: YouTube channel “Information Overload” (video about influencers/Facetune).
• Speaker identity: the Red Queen / Mistress Nera.