Are spouses predestined by Allah? - Assim al hakeem

Main Ideas

The question is whether spouses are “destined by Allah.” Assim al-Hakeem says that marriage—and, more broadly, everything that happens in the world—is within Allah’s decree.

However, belief in destiny should not be used to justify passivity or pressure someone to endure harm. People may say “it was destined” to comfort themselves after a rejected proposal, or tell someone in an abusive or otherwise harmful marriage to simply accept it. The speaker says this is not a sound way to apply the idea.

Allah’s decree does not remove the need to take practical steps. The speaker gives the example of hunger: it may be destined, but a person is still expected to seek food and eat.

Someone facing abuse, oppression, or a spouse who is unsuitable for them and their family may seek help and consider ending the marriage. The speaker mentions reporting physical abuse to the police, supporting a report with evidence such as medical records, and seeking divorce or khulʿ where appropriate.

Divorce, illness, and death are also within Allah’s decree. The speaker’s point is that accepting divine decree does not mean refusing to address problems or endure preventable harm.

Speakers and Sources

• Assim al-Hakeem — Answers the question and explains the relationship between divine decree and taking action.
• Jihan — Identified in the subtitles as the person who asked the question.