I'm 39, Single, and Living Alone in Singapore. Have I Failed?

Reflection on Life at 39

The narrator, a 39-year-old woman living in Singapore, reflects on whether being single, living alone, and not owning a condo or car means she has fallen behind in life. Comparing herself with her peers can make her feel inadequate, especially when considering the cost of car ownership in Singapore—a COE reportedly reaching S$130,000.

At the same time, she enjoys her independent life. Through YouTube, she is reflecting on the choices she has made and what she wants next.

Career and Financial Choices

She spent about ten years teaching, a job she valued for its work with children and music. However, she often felt undervalued, particularly when she started on a diploma-holder salary of S$1,800 a month.

After saving enough to buy a home, she left teaching at 35 to move into arts programming. She accepted a substantial pay cut, returning to a monthly salary of about S$3,500.

Key Reflections

• Saving can create options. Careful spending and saving helped her feel secure enough to leave a stable job and try a new career.
• Money matters, but its purpose matters too. She values money for the freedom and choices it provides, while questioning whether earning more would bring lasting satisfaction.
• Success is personal. A bigger home, car, promotion, or family may matter to some people, but they are not the only measures of a worthwhile life.
• Simple experiences can be deeply meaningful. Childhood picnics and camping trips with her family cost little but became some of her happiest memories.
• Make room for things you have long wanted to try. She recently learned to ride a motorcycle, a goal she had held for nearly 20 years. She also mentions starting a YouTube channel and going horse riding.
• Appreciate what is already working. She likes having her own space, enjoys her current job and hobbies, and is grateful for her home, relationships, and freedom—even while sometimes wishing she had more.

References

• Location: Singapore
• Housing: Her old three-room HDB flat
• Organizations and terms: MOE; COE
• Speaker: The video’s narrator, a 39-year-old woman living in Singapore