Bullying in the Preschool Years

Key wellness / social-emotional strategies to prevent bullying in preschool

Build social problem-solving skills

• Teach children concrete, step-by-step ways to analyze and resolve everyday social problems.
• Use puppet role plays, demonstrations, and illustrated stories to discuss “abstract” social situations in a tangible way.
• Give children practice in:
  • Thinking of solutions
  • Anticipating consequences
  • Evaluating how harmful a situation is

Strengthen impulse control + self-calming (emotional regulation)

• Encourage self-calming when children experience strong emotions.
• Use modeling and many practice opportunities so children learn regulation strategies through repetition.

Teach relaxation as a learned skill (use playful techniques)

• Prefer movement/imagery-based relaxation that children can understand, such as:
  • “Melt like snow people” / “snow sculptures”
  • “Tiny seeds” that grow slowly into flowers/trees
  • “Inflating and deflating balloons” (with breathing framed as a game)
  • “Statues” and “rag dolls” to help children contract/relax muscles in a meaningful way
• Avoid muscle-contraction instructions that don’t translate well for young kids (e.g., “contract and relax muscles” may be abstract).

Improve attentive listening (to reduce misunderstandings)

• Practice turn-taking and comprehension skills by:
  • Reminding children to look at the speaker
  • Being quiet while the other person talks
  • Repeating what the other person said to confirm understanding

Use direct, empathetic consequences to stop harmful behavior

• Shared example: a kindergarten teacher addressed a boy (Brian) calling another child “tan man.”
• The teacher explained the difference between:
  • Outside hurt (visible cuts/bruises)
  • Inside hurt (unseen emotional hurt that lasts longer)
• She reinforced classroom safety norms:
  • Everyone must be safe
  • No one is permitted to hurt others
• She required the child to repeat back what was said to ensure understanding.

Develop empathy skills

• Help children:
  • Label their own feelings
  • Share how they feel with others
• Teach that people may differ, but basic feelings are shared.
• Use empathy prompts:
  • Model how you notice another person’s distress and how you’d help.
  • Ask reflective questions like: “Has that ever happened to you?” to help children connect emotionally.

Use proactive inclusion to prevent ridicule

• A group of parents with children who have Down syndrome worked with schools to prevent exclusion by:
  • Asking to teach classrooms about different disabilities
  • Coming in to explain characteristics and needs (e.g., patience, learning pace)
  • Emphasizing that children with disabilities have feelings like everyone else and deserve friendship and respect.

Teach assertiveness (standing up fairly)

• Define assertiveness as standing up for oneself in a fair, respectful way without attacking.
• Teach practical scripts/behaviors:
  • Speak directly to peers rather than through an adult
  • Ask for and offer things politely (open-ended requests)
  • Practice saying “no” politely and accepting “no” with a simple response like “Okay.”

Use multiple delivery methods

• These skills can be taught via:
  • Presentations
  • Modeling
  • Discussions
  • Storytelling
  • Videos
  • Role-playing
  • Games
  • Curricular activities

Presenters / sources mentioned

• A kindergarten teacher (name not provided) — shared the “Brian” and “tan man” story.
• A friend of the speaker (name not provided) — discussed proactive inclusion with parents of children with Down syndrome.