Ungettable (Becoming The Man EVERY Woman Wants)

Key wellness + self-care + productivity strategies to become “ungettable”

(more attractive, confident, and desirable)

• Sort out your health and physique first

  • Improve body composition with the right training and nutrition
    • If overweight: lose weight
    • If too skinny: consider bulking
  • If you’re extremely skinny despite eating normally, consider talking to a doctor (possible thyroid/medical causes).

• Get stronger + leaner

  • Use exercise to build strength and improve your physique, which increases attractiveness.

• Improve posture (confidence + presence)

  • Practice standing straight with shoulders back and no slouching.
  • Consider a chiropractor if posture issues are persistent.

• Upgrade style and grooming (without overspending)

  • Get professional style help (ask for what suits your body shape/height), then find cheaper alternatives.
  • Use cost-effective sourcing:
    • Thrift/second-hand shops
    • Vinted (or similar resale apps)
  • Take photos in the outfits to remember fits/sizes, then search for cheaper equivalents.
  • Build a versatile wardrobe:
    • Buy in multiple colors for key items (shoes/boots, trousers, belts, jackets).
    • Mix and match (e.g., dark jeans + brown shoes + brown belt + dark jacket).
  • Grooming basics: get regular haircuts (e.g., barber 1–2 times a month) to look clean and polished.
  • Recommended style resource: Models by Mark Manson.

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Key confidence, dating, and emotional strategy (productivity of your mindset)

• Build “unshakable confidence”

  • Reduce approval-seeking and needing validation (friends/family, especially women).
  • Choose activities that make you feel confident and energized:
    • If workouts boost confidence → work out more.
    • If deep work/side projects boost confidence → do those consistently.
  • Look for evidence you’re improving:
    • Seeing results increases competence → competence breeds confidence.
  • Handle rejection/pressure without emotional collapse (emotional control signals strong confidence).

• Have a strong purpose outside of dating

  • Develop a life that’s already “the main quest” (side hustle, skill learning, flow-state activities).
  • Treat women as a side focus, not the center of your identity.
  • This reduces:
    • Over-texting / over-pursuing after dates
    • Needy behavior
  • It also makes you seem more mysterious/aloof because you have a life and plans.

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Leadership behavior (social productivity skill)

• Become a leader by going first
  • With friends: when deciding what to do next, offer the first suggestion every time.
  • At work: in meetings, be the first to propose an approach/plan.
  • With dates:
    • Lead by choosing a place + time
    • Avoid asking “what do you want to do?” as the default
    • Your job is to set options and take initiative
  • Maintain that “go first” mindset even in a relationship (planning next steps, decisions).

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Positive emotion + date atmosphere strategy

• Create positive emotions on dates

  • Make the experience enjoyable: be fun, flirty, silly, upbeat.
  • Avoid heavy/controversial topics that trigger conflict.
  • If serious topics arise, shift to a more positive angle and change the subject.

• Use the dating blueprint for tactics

  • The speaker references a “dating blueprint” to help you appear more mysterious/aloof and increase attraction.
  • Cost mentioned: £3.

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Presenters / sources

• Presenter/Coach: Christine (dating, relationship, and personal development coach)
• Book source mentioned: Models by Mark Manson
• Programs/Resources referenced: “dating blueprint” (link in description) and email coaching (Christine; details in description)