Movie Reviews with Microsoft Sam: Thomas and the Magic Railroad

Overview

The reviewer (Microsoft Sam) tears into Thomas and the Magic Railroad, calling it a dull, pointless follow-up that “shouldn’t have been made,” while also admitting it isn’t as bad as some other media he dislikes.

---

Main Plot (Spoiler-Filled)

• Alec Baldwin appears as Mr. Conductor, but the reviewer criticizes the performance as being wasted due to poor writing.
• The story shifts to Diesel 10, an “evil” diesel engine with a retractable claw. The reviewer grudgingly admits this is the most entertaining element of the entire movie.
• Human scenes at Shining Time Station are heavily mocked—long, boring sequences involving kids and random subplots that don’t fit the engine-focused appeal of Thomas.

Off-Track Subplots the Reviewer Targets

• Thomas arrives eight seconds late: the reviewer calls it pointless character weakness that doesn’t affect the plot.
• A girl boards the wrong train, ending up at Shining Time Station / Muffle Mountain. There’s a particularly nonsensical moment where she seemingly misinterprets a station dog—since the dog doesn’t talk, the reviewer finds it nonsensical.

Criticized Antagonist/Backstory

• Lady the magic steam engine gets an extremely criticized backstory.
  • Diesel 10 seemingly wants to destroy her with no clear motivation.
  • The movie’s explanation for her crash and survival doesn’t add up.

The Brief Excitement (Near the End)

• The film becomes exciting only near the end:
  • Thomas and Diesel 10 chase each other through an epic-feeling sequence involving a collapsing bridge.
  • The reviewer highlights it as the closest thing to adrenaline the film offers.

Ending

• The ending resolves with the characters retrieving gold discs and returning to the “happy” ending.
• Despite the resolution, the reviewer maintains that the overall journey was nonsense.

---

Highlights & Recurring Reactions

• Diesel 10 is repeatedly framed as the “best thing” in the movie because he’s cool and enjoys being evil (the reviewer specifically notes the “attached claw = cool” idea).
• Even so, the reviewer argues that the writing ruins the story around him.

Common Complaints

• Thomas being late by eight seconds feels absurd and unjustified.
• Human characters and their scenes are everywhere, dragging pacing down.
• Multiple moments are inconsistent or illogical, including:
  • how characters travel between realities
  • how injuries are survivable
  • how the chase/bridge sequence details work

---

Production / Trial Audience Rant

The reviewer claims Diesel 10 wasn’t originally the main villain. Instead, Petey “Booster” was cut after test audiences complained. The reviewer argues that was the biggest mistake.

---

Final Recommendation

If you’re a fan, the reviewer recommends avoiding this entry and watching something else—specifically “Thomas and the Monsters Engine.”

---

Personalities Appearing

• Microsoft Sam (the narrator/reviewer; the main “personality” driving the reactions)