Männer wissen nicht mehr, wer sie sind

Key wellness / self-care / productivity strategies mentioned

• Redefine “being a man” daily (self-leadership)

  • Each day choose consciously who you are and what role you play (avoid defaulting to old role models).
  • Act with responsibility: notice patterns like avoiding conflict, “running away,” or repeating father/old-man scripts.

• Let “old inner parts” die—without rejecting everything

  • Keep stabilizing structures like family/community, but allow outdated inner roles (especially inherited expectations) to transform or end.
  • Replace “I have to be like my father” with “I decide who I am now.”

• Practice real presence (reduce “scanning”)

  • “Presence” is described as being fully with the person you’re with—attention, listening, and sensing what’s happening between you.
  • Practical self-check: if your system is “scanning” (e.g., “Is my wife doing X? Am I doing it right?”), come back to yourself and learn to perceive your inner state.
  • Women are portrayed as able to sense when men aren’t truly “there.”

• Regulate aggression by building healthy access to anger

  • Many men suppress/redirect anger; the talk emphasizes the need to feel anger safely, then channel it constructively.
  • Warning: without appropriate spaces, anger may leak into violence, emotional harm, passive-aggression, sexual aggression, or coercive dynamics.
  • Interim outlet suggested: sport (including martial arts/MMA elements) in a healthy framework that doesn’t turn aggression inward or toward others.

• Deal with powerlessness (after anger)

  • After anger comes a difficult state—powerlessness/faintness/having no solution.
  • The “opportunity” described: from powerlessness you can re-discover identity and where vulnerability or stability is needed.
  • Avoid unhealthy coping loops (e.g., using masturbation, alcohol, or sex to discharge anger instead of feeling it).

• Use the “partners radiate” signal—then set boundaries

  • Men are encouraged to notice subtle signals (not just words): the emotional “radiation” that invites action or boundary-setting.
  • Practical examples: repeated household agreements (e.g., toilet paper roll) indicate tests/boundaries; interpret repeating patterns as clues.

• Treat repeating relationship patterns as “life initiations”

  • When cycles repeat (same conflict, same relationship ending pattern, repeating partners), pause and investigate:
    • What do these situations have in common?
    • What pattern in your responses is being re-triggered?
  • This is framed as a lever for insight and change.

• Build a conscious male community (don’t rely only on women)

  • A central pillar: men need other men who mirror growth without status games (“no proving, no hiding”).
  • The community is described as the environment where men can connect deeply (not only pub/football-style bonding).
  • “Love other men as brothers” is suggested to improve one’s partnership and intimacy.

• Work from pain to purpose

  • Common motivation for attending men’s seminars is partnership/intimacy struggles and disorientation—then finding a next level.
  • “Business and mission” is framed as living alignment with what calls you (purpose may include fatherhood, not only career).

• Step out of externalizing blame

  • The talk criticizes constant “culprit searching” (politics, media, road traffic, partners) as distraction from inward perception.
  • Suggested practice: pause, sense/feel what’s actually happening inside you, and take responsibility.

• Avoid “simple solutions” role-model traps

  • Cautions against simplistic, status-driven masculinity scripts that promise:
    • wealth, lots of women, dominance—without inner work.
  • Encourages men to seek models that match healing signals (self-leadership, honesty, vulnerability, ability to hold pain without immediate social-media/escape behaviors).

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Program framework / methodology (as described)

The speaker outlines four pillars of “The New Man Programme”:

1. Self-leadership (foundation)

   • honesty with yourself; see where you avoid looking

2. Partnership & intimacy

   • full presence; hold emotions; maintain attraction; be “rock in the surf” (with room to be human and request breaks)

3. Business & mission

   • commit to what truly calls you; purpose can be broader than business (including being a father)

4. Male community

   • connection with other men who support growth; reduces reliance on female role models only

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Presenters / sources (mentioned in the subtitles)

• Moritz Ertinger — entrepreneur, men’s coach, co-founder of The New Man Programme
• Leila Bust — discussed regarding women’s issues / equality discussions
• Andrew Tate — used as an example of “role models” and simplistic masculinity scripts
• Patrick Reiser — mentioned in the context of healthier conversations/awareness
• “Anton” — mentioned as an example working with boys/fathers on hikes and father-son weekends
• Jasmin — appears as an interviewer/participant in the conversation
• World War I / World War II — historical reference (as context, not a personal source)