Stuck in a Stalemate with a Non-Catholic Friend? Try This

Summary

Rory, a Catholic caller from Pennsylvania, asks how to move past an apparent stalemate with a non-Catholic friend who believes in Scripture but has intellectual objections to Catholic teachings. They both offer arguments and evidence—for example, about praying to the saints—and Rory worries that neither of them will change their mind.

Jimmy Akin’s main advice is that the presence of arguments on both sides does not mean the evidence is equally strong or that the discussion must remain deadlocked. He compares the situation to scientific debates: competing theories may both have supporting evidence, but new observations or a better assessment of existing evidence can eventually favor one side.

Practical approach to the discussion

• Compare the evidence, not just the fact that arguments exist. Ask which side has stronger evidence and why, based on the discussion so far.
• Stay open to better evidence. One person may already have stronger support, or may find it as the discussion continues.
• Recognize that evidence does not guarantee persuasion. Someone may refuse to acknowledge stronger evidence. Akin notes that scientific ideas can persist despite being discredited, invoking the saying that science advances “one funeral at a time.”
• Represent the other person’s position fairly. Try to understand the friend’s point of view rather than relying on weak or misleading arguments.
• Set aside weak points. They can distract from the central issue and derail the conversation.
• Focus on the strongest arguments. Akin calls this “bulletproof apologetics”: remove arguments that are not robust and build the discussion around the best evidence available.

Akin also points Rory toward resources on the intercession of saints, including podcast episodes about the intercession of angels and Mary, a short response to an argument by Protestant apologist Gavin Ortlund, and a longer forthcoming podcast response to Ortlund. The segment ends with an offer of one of Akin’s apologetics books.

Speakers and sources

• Jimmy Akin — Host and respondent.
• Rory from Pennsylvania — Caller asking about discussions with a non-Catholic friend.
• Siri — Virtual assistant used in the exchange about scientific debates and evidence.
• Gavin Ortlund — Protestant apologist whose arguments about praying to saints are discussed.
• Scientific debates — Used as an analogy for how competing evidence can be assessed over time.
• Jimmy Akin’s resources — Podcast episodes on intercession and the books Everyday Defense and A Daily Defense.