What Changes When God Opens Your Eyes? Rabbi YY Jacobson

Summary

Rabbi YY Jacobson builds the lecture around a small detail in the Torah’s account of Hagar and Ishmael: after their water runs out in the wilderness, God “opens her eyes,” and Hagar sees a well. The Torah does not say that God created a well. The well was already there; what changed was Hagar’s ability to see it. Jacobson uses this episode to explore the difference between physical sight and the deeper capacity to recognize what is present—in other people, in ourselves, and in our circumstances.

The Well That Was Already There

The Torah describes Hagar’s desperation: she believes Ishmael is about to die, moves away because she cannot bear to watch, and cries. After God hears the boy, an angel tells Hagar not to fear, to lift him up, and that he will become a great nation. Then God opens her eyes, and she finds water.

Jacobson emphasizes that the story’s turning point is not necessarily the appearance of something new. The water was available, but Hagar could not see it in her distress. A Midrash draws a broader lesson from this: people are, in a sense, “blind” until God opens their eyes. The morning blessing “Who opens the eyes of the blind” can therefore refer not only to waking up, but also to gaining insight and noticing realities that were previously hidden.

The Sefat Emet, quoting his grandfather the Chidushei Harim, teaches that what a person needs may already be close at hand—but a person needs open eyes to recognize it. Jacobson connects this idea to the prayer “Gal einai,” meaning “Open my eyes,” asking not only for God to change one’s circumstances, but for the ability to perceive what is already there.

The Midrash also makes the puzzling claim that Hagar lacked faith. Jacobson presents this as a challenging interpretive question rather than offering a definite explanation for it.

Seeing Beyond the Surface

Jacobson applies the lesson to relationships. People can become so fixed in familiar complaints that they stop seeing the person in front of them. A spouse may appear only as critical or emotionally distant; a parent or child may be reduced to their difficult behaviors. Opening one’s eyes does not erase harm or remove the need for boundaries, accountability, or changes in behavior. It may, however, make it possible to notice the vulnerability, burdens, fears, love, and sacrifices that are also present.

He extends this to relationships across generations. Children may try to understand the limitations and hardships their parents faced while still acknowledging their own pain. Parents, in turn, may need to look beyond a child’s difficulties and recognize the deeper person beneath them. This kind of seeing requires maturity and self-reflection: people may struggle to recognize emotional depth in others if they have never learned to acknowledge it in themselves.

A story about Otto Frank illustrates how much can remain unknown even between people who love each other. After reading his daughter Anne Frank’s diary, he said he discovered depths of her inner life that he had not fully known while she was alive. Jacobson uses this example to stress that closeness does not automatically mean that we truly see another person.

Seeing Oneself with Honesty and Compassion

The lecture’s central Talmudic story concerns Rabbi Elazar ben Rabbi Shimon. Returning from study in a joyful state, he becomes proud and encounters an extremely unattractive-looking man. When the man greets him respectfully, Rabbi Elazar responds with an insult about his appearance and asks whether everyone in the man’s town is as ugly as he is. The man tells him to complain to the Creator who made him.

Rabbi Elazar realizes he has acted wrongly, asks forgiveness, and follows the man until he eventually agrees to forgive him—on the condition that Rabbi Elazar not make such behavior habitual.

Jacobson draws several lessons from the episode:

• Spiritual joy can be overtaken by ego. A person may begin with gratitude or genuine spiritual achievement, then turn that experience into pride and a sense of superiority.
• The stranger can represent an encounter with the self. Tosafot identifies the figure as Elijah the Prophet. Jacobson also reads the encounter as a profound confrontation with the part of oneself one rejects or shames.
• Self-reflection is different from self-condemnation. Rabbi Elazar needs to recognize that his behavior was wrong. But a constant inner voice declaring “I am ugly,” “I am worthless,” or “I am terrible” is not the same as taking responsibility. It can conceal a person’s deeper worth and prevent growth.
• A person’s worth is grounded in being created by God. Recognizing that one’s actions need correction does not mean denying the value of one’s existence. Jacobson urges listeners to see themselves as more than their mistakes, wounds, or harsh self-judgments.

He connects this to the experience often called impostor syndrome: people may be praised by others yet privately feel fraudulent, ashamed, or unworthy. The lecture encourages honest accountability without letting the inner critic define the whole self.

Ways to Practice “Opening the Eyes”

The lecture is not presented as a rigid program, but it suggests several practices:

• Ask for perception as well as change. Pray to be able to see what is already present, not only for circumstances to become different.
• Pause before reducing someone to a familiar label. Consider what fears, needs, burdens, or affection may exist beneath the behavior you usually focus on.
• Look inward with both honesty and compassion. Acknowledge specific harmful actions and make amends, but do not confuse those actions with your entire identity.
• Remain open to help arriving in unexpected forms. A person, experience, or opportunity may become a means of insight or healing.
• Prepare for insight, while recognizing it cannot be forced. People can do inner work, ask for help, and become more receptive, but the moment of seeing may arrive as a gift. Preparation matters because an opportunity can appear and still go unnoticed.
• Use inward attention to look beyond appearances. Jacobson observes that people often close their eyes during prayer, blessing, or an embrace. He suggests that turning away from external distractions can sometimes help a person perceive deeper realities.

The lecture closes by returning to Hagar: when her perception changes, she sees the water that can sustain her child. The broader message is that a changed way of seeing can reveal resources, beauty, and human dignity that were present all along.

Speakers and Sources Featured

Speakers

• Rabbi YY Jacobson, the lecturer
• An unidentified audience member, who asks a question near the end

Texts, Teachings, and People Discussed

• The Torah, especially Genesis 21:14–19 in Parashat Vayera
• Hazal and Midrash Rabbah on Vayera 53:14, including Rabbi Benjamin’s teaching
• The Sefat Emet and his grandfather, the Chidushei Harim (Rabbi Yitzchak Meir Alter)
• The morning blessing “Pokeach Ivrim” and the prayer “Gal einai”
• The Talmudic account of Rabbi Elazar ben Rabbi Shimon; Tosafot’s identification of the strange man with Elijah the Prophet
• Maimonides (the Rambam), The Guide for the Perplexed, on angels
• Helen Keller and her teacher Anne Sullivan
• Anne Frank, Otto Frank, and Miep Gies
• Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis (the name is unclear in the subtitles) and Rabbi Dovid Ungreis
• Rebbe Zusha of Anipoli and the Maggid of Mezeritch
• Rebbe Nachman, mentioned in connection with people’s habitual way of seeing
• Michelangelo, in an anecdote about seeing a figure within marble
• ChatGPT and artificial intelligence, discussed in an anecdote about responses, compliments, and the need to verify sources
• Jewish practices and phrases, including Shema Yisrael, Shalom Aleichem, and the blessing of children