How To Not Be Awkward

Summary

The video argues that awkwardness often grows when you focus on monitoring yourself—wondering what to say, whether to speak, or how you appear. That self-focus can make you less present in the conversation, much like consciously tracking every movement while walking can make walking feel unnatural. Rather than searching for the perfect behavior, shift your attention outward and engage with what is happening around you.

Strategies and practical tips

• Redirect your attention outward: Listen closely to the other person and notice your surroundings instead of evaluating yourself.
• Participate naturally: To enter a conversation, use a small hand gesture or say, “Can I jump in for a second?” Then connect your comment to what was said.
• Handle people talking at once with acknowledgment: If you begin speaking at the same time as someone else, signal that you have something to share—for example, “I’d love to share something with you.” Gestures can also help clarify who should go first.
• Don’t automatically blame yourself: Conversation involves two people. Someone who talks without leaving room for others may be contributing to the difficulty, rather than you simply “doing it wrong.”
• Seek people who are attuned to you: Conversations may feel easier with people who notice when others want to speak. The speaker also notes that two highly anxious people can end up repeatedly yielding the floor to each other.

Presenter/source: Dr. K (HealthyGamerGG).